Way Back When...

Cassandra yawned as she tried to keep her head still. The clock on the stove read six oh seven, and her older sister Caroline was barely halfway done pressing her sandy brown locks for the first day of school. More specifically, the first day of junior high.

Seventh grade at Benjamin Franklin Junior High School, because back then, junior high was grades seven, eight, and nine. Seventh grade meant seven different classrooms instead of staying in one all day. It meant gym class, and sports if she wanted. And it meant walking a whole new route with Carrie in the mornings.

Elm Street Elementary was going the opposite way. Carrie would walk her and then take the connecting school bus the other way to school. Now, though, she’d be walking Carrie and her friends. Older, cooler kids. Including her crush. 

That thought woke Cass all the way up, and made the too-hot pressing comb singe her ear.

“Ow! Carrie!” She covered her ear and glared at her sister, who set the comb back on the stove.

“I told you to be still. You should have just stayed up like I did.” Carrie took the pressing comb off the fire and blew onto it, like that would somehow cool it down.

“You were gonna stay up anyway, talking to that man on the phone,” Cass whispered, frowning harder.

Carrie was only in ninth grade, but all her boyfriends were at least three years older than her. Cass knew she wasn’t doing anything with them, because they always left her alone once they figured out she wasn’t budging. Still, Cass hated it, even if they gave them money for groceries, and this current one bought them new clothes and backpacks.

Carrie developed early. Early like, third grade early. So now, at fifteen, Carrie had the body of a woman in her twenties.

And every day, Cass prayed she stayed petite.

“That man is the reason you got new shoes. And he’s gonna be the reason I get my permit so we can start using Mama’s car.”

“Mama hasn’t driven that thing since I was in diapers. You think it still works?”

Carrie shrugged before running the hot comb through Cass’s edges. “Ghost gave me twenty dollars to use it one night and he didn’t tell me it didn’t work. Once I get my permit, I can get a job, and then it won’t be no more men, Cassie. Pinky promise.” Carrie held out her pinky and Cass took it.

It had been just them for a while. Their mother Loretta, bless her heart, had a major stroke at her husband’s funeral. Their neighbor sat with her in the daytime for a portion of her social security check, and then they made sure she was okay at night.

Loretta physically recovered, but mentally? She’s been gone since her husband passed. But it’s been like this for so long, it didn’t bother Carrie nor Cass much. They learned to adapt, and as long as they kept their grades up and stayed out of trouble so DCFS didn’t come sniffing around, everything was gravy.

“You want curls?” Carrie asked. 

“Nah. I think Sherrie is curling her hair. I want two French braids.”

Carrie nodded and turned off the stove. They both had coarse, long, sandy brown hair, courtesy of whoever their father was. It damn sure wasn’t Loretta’s husband.

Well, Loretta was married to their father at one point. They moved into this apartment together when they first migrated from down south. From what their neighbor said, he was Creole, with fair skin, green-gray eyes, with light brown hair. Tall and lanky. He and Loretta moved into the newly constructed Birch Housing Project while she was heavily pregnant with Carrie. He worked odd jobs and then when she was pregnant with Cass, went to the army where he went missing in action. Loretta held out hope until one day that same nosy neighbor saw her throwing out a box filled with all his stuff. The only thing the neighbor kept for the girls was an old photo of him in uniform, but it didn’t have his name on it.

Carrie and Cass were both the spitting image of their father. Cass secretly thought that was why their mother never really cared for either of them.

By the time Carrie finished Cass’s hair, it was past time for them to leave for school. Cass showered the night before, so it was nothing to put on her blue shorts, a white sleeveless blouse, and some white sandals. Carrie threw on a cut off midriff, some bell bottoms and some chucks, and they were racing toward the stairs.

All the kids in the Birch knew each other, but it was still cliqued off by which tower you were in. Cass and Carrie stayed in Tower Two, so they only hung with Tower Two kids. Cass’s best girlfriend was Sheryl Freeman. They were in the same grade, and both equally excited to start junior high.

Sheryl was staring at the glass doors waiting for Cass. She could tell because as soon as Cass and Carrie burst through the doors, Sheryl’s scowl broke into a bright smile.

Cass ran up to her and wound her arms around her, them both jumping and squealing.

“I made Sergie and his friends wait for you guys.” Sheryl gestured behind her, to the three boys talking to each other.

Sergio, Sheryl’s brother, looked Carrie up and down and licked his lips. “What’s good, Carrie?”

Carrie rolled her eyes and kept walking toward her girlfriends. “C’mon, Cass.”

“I wanna walk with Sherrie!” Cass whined.

“Don’t be like that, Carrie. We don’t bite… much.” Sergio cackled, making Carrie flip him the bird.

“Ugh, Sergie! Gross!” Sheryl began to hit Sergio on his chest before jumping for his head. Sergio ran away, laughing even harder, making Sheryl give chase.

The larger group began walking toward Ben Franklin, all buzzing with excitement about the new school year.

The other boy Sergio was waiting with, Kaleel, nodded to Cass before going to walk with Carrie’s group. He was a year older than Cass, and was always in trouble for stealing. Around the Birch he was known as Bishop, because he was always taking folks’ money.

Cass thought he had a crush on Carrie, which was funny. He never stood a chance.

“Wassup Cass?”

Cass looked to her left and instantly showed all thirty-two of her teeth. “Good morning, Boogie.”

Kaleb was Kaleel’s older brother, who was in Carrie’s class. Kaleb and Kaleel were much like Carrie and Cass, in that all they had was each other. They stayed with their aunt in Tower Two, but Cass never saw her around, so the boys were always in the streets.

And judging by the fat green laces in Kaleb’s chucks, the streets finally got him. More specifically, the gang that ran rampant in the Birch projects, the Birch Babies.

But to Cass, Kaleb would always be Boogie, the lanky boy from the back of the bus that used to love dancing to the radio, and her first crush

“You finally with the big dogs.” Boogie grinned, deep dimples puncturing his cheeks.

Cass nodded, tearing her gaze away from his laces to look ahead. “I know. I’m excited.”

“Anyone mess witchu, let me know ASAP.”

“Carrie told me you’re never at school, so why would I tell you, Boogie?”

He grinned harder. “You be asking CareBear about ya boy?”

Cass’s cheeks burned and her throat went dry. She tried hard, very hard to keep her crush on Boogie under the tightest of wraps, locked away in the farthest part of her mind. Boogie was not only Sergio’s best friend, but was trouble with a capital T. He was always fighting, always up to no good, and if he got put onto the Birch Babies, it was just going to multiply. Cass couldn't be around that. She needed to stay under the radar, so no one asked who was taking care of them.

“Boy bye,” she pushed out, hoping he believed her dismissal. If she went by the permanent smile, he didn’t.

But a small part of her didn’t care too much. Boogie only smiled at her, no one else, and she would revel in it for as long as possible.

“Whatever, Cass. But I can’t leave you up at Franklin unprotected, so I’ll make it up there more. And if you can’t find me, find Bishop, aight? You my lil sister, and I got you.” Boogie wrapped his arm around her in a side hug, and Cass fought to not be so stiff.

But she couldn’t help that hearing he thought of her as a little sister broke her poor twelve year-old heart in two.

But I mean, why wouldn’t he? He was fifteen. Tall, with almond-colored skin. Deep dimples. And even had a shadow of a mustache above his thick upper lip. 

Kaleb Washington was a young gangsta. And Cassandra Lott was… just Cass.

“Ay yo, Boog!”

Boogie looked back, throwing up the Birch Baby sign before turning back to Cass.

“I mean it, Cass. You need me, I’m there.”

“Okay, Boogie.”

He nodded before turning and walking behind them toward whoever called him.

Sheryl slid right next to her, keeping stride like she’d been waiting. “Are you excited? I’m so glad we have a couple periods together. And we get to go to dances! Dancing with boys! Ah! Different boys, too, not from the Birch! But then again, maybe you know who will come around.” Sheryl elbowed Cass gently as she talked a mile a minute.

Sheryl was the only one who knew of Cass’s crush on Boogie. Carrie didn’t count, since she was her sister, and sisters tell each other everything. Sheryl was supportive, but everyone knew the Washington brothers were trouble, so Cass knew her best friend hoped she’d grow out of it.

But each time she saw Boogie around the Birch, it got worse. When he’d buy her favorite ice cream from the truck. When he’d walk the sisters to and from the laundromat. The first time he came home from juvenile hall, and all their close friends spent the day watching tv at his aunt’s house, and he chose to sit next to her on the couch.

It was getting worse, and Cass didn't know if it’d ever get better. If she wanted it to get better.

She chanced a look behind her. Boogie was walking with Sergio and a couple other older boys, all in some type of green. All loud and raunchy and looking for trouble. Most of the time, the Babies would walk the rest of the kids to school before going back to the Birch, since other gangs would drive around trying to pick on them. Yeah, they were hoodlums, but the Birch was a community, a family, and they took care of their own.

Boogie was laughing at something Sergio said, before he shifted his eyes to Cass. He winked at her, like they had their own secret between them. Then he turned his attention back to his friends, and Cass turned back around to Sheryl.

“Yeah, maybe,” she said, placing her hand over her chest, like that would keep her own personal version of Boogie in her heart, where it belonged.